Renewing my blogging vows?

Perhaps I should recommit to this sad and neglected blog! I think I stopped writing and blogging because I was sick of all the woe-is-me-navel-gazing bullshit, but you know, maybe it's all good.

Anyway, you want updates? Chickie turned 4 a few weeks ago. SJL is nearly 22 months. They enjoy each other more and more, and I'm seeing more and more of the benefits of having kids 26.5 months apart. During the car ride back from the Cape yesterday afternoon, they amused themselves by spitting at each other and screaming with glee from Braintree back to JP. Lovely.

I still don't have a job. It's a shitty-ass bad situation out there, and everyone and their mom and has returned my 101 "will you please hire me because I'm so damn awesome and moderately desperate?" emails with "Sorry; we have no money, half of our staff just got laid off, our budget is getting cut, we're in a hiring freeze, bla bla bla." So, let's just say that it ain't good for many people. So, why did I quit my dreamyass job again? Gah. Oh, that hindsight thing... but you know, I can't say I *regret* my choice, but I can't help but kick myself. Oh, well; what can you do...

I do have a job interview for a very part time version of the exact position I had right out of college in 1999. For those of you who know what that was, let's just say that yes, perhaps you *can* go home again. We'll see.

One big piece of news is that my engagement ring and another precious ring of mine (one that Dan gave me for our 5th wedding anniversary a couple years ago) were stolen about 2 months ago. Long story, one that many of you probably know (thanks to dear old Facebook), but I'll tell you the story of my rings in another post. No, not the story of how they were stolen; the story of how I got them. It's a good story :) After all, I think most people would say that the story of how they got engaged is a good story.

I'll end this post with a good story-- my Grandma has been so much on my mind lately. So much. Maybe it's because my boy just turned 4 and I was thinking about making him a cake shaped like a train, and I was wishing that I could ask her for her advice on how to do it since I know she would have given me some great ideas, or maybe I just miss her and still think about her a lot. Whatever it is-- she's been on my mind.

My mom recently distributed her jewelry per her instructions in her will, and when she told me this, I asked her about the pieces that I remember most clearly: her gold bangles, a set of 2 for each wrist-- plain, beautiful, and often worn by married women-- and a delicate pearl and ruby ring. So much of what I remember about her involves her hands-- reading, cooking, pointing something out to me. I can hear the click and clink of her bangles in my mind-- the way they would hit the counter when she rolled out poori dough and the way they would click against the table when she lowered the newspaper to tell you something.

Anyway, I was telling my mom how much I loved her ruby ring and how that ring represented her hands to me, and when my parents came to visit us shortly after my own rings were stolen, my mom said, "I want to give you something..." and gave me a little red jewelry pouch. I had no idea what could be inside, but sure enough, it was Grandma's ring. Oh, to see it in a pouch and not on her hand-- very weird and odd, and a sudden reminder that yes, she is in fact dead. And what's funny is that she hadn't worn that ring in years-- not since she became a widow over 20 years ago-- but I still imagine her wearing it since that's how I remember her hands. It's lovely to have something like this of hers-- I know tangible things aren't everything, but still, it means a lot.

Oh, that was sort of a sad story, huh? Silly me. Oh, well. Anyway, I'm back. Who knows if I have anything really interesting to say, but what the hell...